Expectations

I have written about expectations before.  I truly believe this is one of the biggest things in my life causes strife and misunderstanding.  I don't just see this in my life but i see it in others.  I see it in the friends that i know if their relationships not only with their loved ones but also with friends and family.

When you have expectations, you are setting yourself up for disappointment.

Ryan Reynolds

Its almost funny to me to think of all the suffering i have caused myself because the expectations i have set of other people they have never met.  They haven't met these mainly because I have not told them the expectations i have for them.  This seems to be a song that many people sing in their lives.  They say things like i am a nice person why cant't anyone treat me like i would treat them.  Or we say i would never hurt anyone how can they hurt me.  So we are holding people to the same standards we live our lives by.  Each person has standards and morals for their lives they live and we so often has human being try to control others into being like us without look at where the other person is or how they live their lives.  If i told you to go out to a forest and yell at a tree until it became a bear you would think i was crazy but we do that everyday with our minds and our actions toward other people. We yell at people in traffic because they don't have the manners driving that we do.  We get frustrated with our mates because we want them to react or do something for us and we never ask they are just suppose to know.  We force our thoughts and feeling to others to others for them to make us better.  We expect so much out of others in our lives to make us feel better and so many times we require nothing out of ourselves to find happiness.  We ask others to fulfill our needs in relationships and in life but never look inside of how we can make ourselves happier.  We give others the keys to our happiness and never tell them what would make us happy.  When we don't state our expectations in life and in relationships those expectations will never be met.  When have to have clear expectations on how we want things to go in life and state them clearly or we can never expect to achieve those things.
If you paint in your mind a picture of bright and happy expectations, you put yourself into a condition conducive to your goal.

Norman Vincent Peale

Read more at http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/keywords/expectations.html#IZGjQo5V5EyF5zs8.99

I truly hope this finds you well and that you enjoyed it.  Speak your expectations to others and to life.  Write them down what you want out of life and look at that each day so that you are focused on those things.  Never expect anyone to bring you happiness bring it with you.  We all have down times i have had my share and many of the friends that read this have gone though these times with me.  but when you are in those times you truly have a choice of what you expect to happen from it.  some times you need time to let things bleed.  But then you have to expect something better in life.  Set those and move toward them.  Even if just a little bit each and everyday.

World smile day

World smile day

Today is one of my favorite days of the year.  World smile day. 

I know that a lot of people don’t even know about this day. It was always cool to me.  As most of you know my father owned a store for many years called the happy shack.  It was about spreading the message and love of the smiley among other things.  This is where I learned of smile day and what it means.  It is about doing acts of kindness to spread smiles around the world.  I love this thought this concept.  Nothing needs to be said when a smile is on your face.  It speaks loudly and proudly.  I truly believe this is one of the world’s most beautiful things seeing others smile. 

This smile day is different for me however.  As many of you know I had major dental work done this past year before which I had a broken front tooth.  This issue with the tooth kept me from smiling fully and held me back in my happiness.  Getting that fixed and investing in myself really went a long way in my happiness and in my peace.  So this is the first world smile day I can wear my smile loud and proud in a very long time.  For some this may not seem like much but this is a huge thing for me.  SO this is the first smile day in a long time I can celebrate and enjoy with a big smile on my face. 

So today wear a smile for the world to see.  Do an act of kindness to bring a smile to someone’s face. 

 

The test

The Test

Well some of you may know that today was a big day for Eddie.  It was a test that was for all to marbles so to say.  If I passed the test then I kept my job and could move forward.  If I failed the test I would be unemployed and starting all over.  It was a pretty big risk in my eyes.  I felt a lot of anxiety going into it.  I had help from loved ones that I looked over.  I had plenty of time to study and was able to know the material very well.  But I also learned a lot of lessons though this test about myself and also about my relationships with this planet. 

The test was something that was harder in my mind then it actually was.  I built it up to be this big thing that if I failed life would end.  I was wrong on that point.  I felt if I failed my girl would leave me I would be homeless.  But as most of you know the things we worry about mostly never come true.  God gave us this amazing imagination and I used it to imagine all the ways that things could go wrong.  I had drawn up all kinds of ways that things could go wrong.  I have done this a lot in my life with just about everything.  I find the reasons to say no in life not to say yes.  Find the reasons to fail not the reasons why I am going to win.  I know that I am not alone in this.  I have an amazing imagination and pointed in the right direction could help me create an amazing life.  If the visions and imagination were pointed to the positive then more positive would happen. 

I have learned more than just insurance from this test.  I have learned about faith.  When I say that word most think of religion.  Yes that can be a source of your faith but that is not the type of faith I am talking about.  Faith is defined at the evidence of things unseen things hoped for.  Most people think of faith as a positive thing and that is always pointed toward good things.  But it isn’t.  Faith can also be given to the negative side of life and faith will still be the evidence of things unseen but for a negative purpose.   Faith can give us the negative along with the positive that all depends on us and our focus.  If we focus on the negative then we will receive it in return.

“A negative mind and never produce a positive life.”

Dalia lama

So we must train our minds to lean to the positive in life.  To look for things that can go right not things that can go wrong.  When a situation happens in life look at how the universe is helping us not hurting us. 

Long time no post

Well it has been a long time I posted in eddavate.  It has been a time of expansion and honestly i have been horrible with my time management.

Where i have been and where i am going are amazingly different.  I have the time hop app.  I have watched my posts from the past few years and been amazed at how much i have grown and how well i can handle things now.  it is amazing what a human can change if they control their minds.  I tend to let my mind run wild. I tend to take any situation and let it go to the negative of that subject.  that i letting my mind run the show.  Thoughts control what comes in and out of our lives.  When we focus on the negative that we have we continue to receive the negative because the field of possible thinks this is what we want.  If we want better things for our lives we must focus on the positive we have.  That is why gratitude is so important.  we can take an amazing relationship and ruin it with negative thoughts and fear.  We can act in either fear or love.  That is the choice we truly have in life.  Act in fear or love.  So many times we fear losing someone or something in our lives.

I am done for this short eddavate.  i will be writing more and i hope you are well.  

A Tragic past does not define your present.

A Tragic past does not define your present. 

In our lives we all have tragic events that happen to us.  We have all experienced times in our lives that have been tragic and difficult to deal with.  In those moments of heartbreak and pain we find ourselves drowning in the pain.  We may find it hard to breath it shows on you physical self just as much as our emotional.  These times can be brought on by the actions of others and our expectations of those people and how they should act.  It can be a death in life that causes those times of hurt.  It can be so many different things that can cause these pains.  No matter what the reason for the tragedies we have in life we all have ways that we deal with those things and how we process that pain. 

Some people deal with those things very quickly and move to the next level in life.  Their happiness set point is at a point where they go back to being happy and have the confidence to move to that and process the pain.  Some are taught from an early age how to deal with setbacks and move forward and learn from them.  However some others are not taught these things in life and allow the hurts and pains define them for a very long time.  They allow the hurt to linger for so many reasons.  Some let it linger cause they would feel they betrayed the other if they moved on.  Some don’t have the confidence to move on.  Some allow others to control their emotions.  There again is so many reasons to hold on to pain. 

 With all that being said we should not allow our tragedy in the past to define what happens in our present.  We have all heard everything happens for a reason and that there are lessons in everything.  Those are both true but we have to learn the skills to find those lessons change our behavior and go to that next level in life.  So many of us get stuck in the pain and tragedy of life that we don’t get to see the beauty in life.  We believe our happiness is in the next vacation or in the next shopping trip.  We fail to heal our hearts and move forward to the next level.  I am learning myself how to deal with a lot of pain in my life that I have carried most my life.  Pain from parents and from family pain from events pain from death.  I know that I have to move forward and allow healing to happen as do all people if we are to move to the next amazing level life has to offer us. 

So what I want to know from my readers how do you deal with the pains from life?  What are you still holding on too?  You can contact me anyway you want if you want to share.  I will not share anything with anyone.  I am using the methods I have learned and I am enjoying seeing life for the joy and newness that it is.  I honestly think that the first step to healing in honesty about the situation and to stop placing blame on others.  Honesty and taking full responsibility for where you are in life are the things I think are so important to anyone’s happiness. 

So as I leave you I want you to think about the pain you are holding on too.  Why not just forgive?  Why not take responsibility for where you are in life and move forward instead of staying in the same place?  Are you living in the moment?  And are you being honest and authentic in everyday life? 

If you are not happy and holding pain ask yourself these questions.  Then move forward reach out to start the healing process take the first step.  Listen to a podcast. Call a friend. Ask for help. Anything to start the process of healing rolling. 

Is you past defining you?

Last night I spent time talking to the girlfriend about some of our past experiences and our family backgrounds.  As I found each of us sharing our past experiences it struck me how real all those things were to me again now that I was talking about them.  Things I don’t think about on a normal basis but when I did bring them to the front of my memory how they had shaped a lot of my actions in life.  We talked about parents about uncles and aunts.  It just came to me how much we don’t know about our past also.  It also got me to thinking about how much I wish I knew.  Everyone has a past some that we share with others and some that we don’t.  I wonder what some of my families truths were.  I wonder what type of people they were on the inside. 

These wonders are normal because the human heart wants to know where I came from.  What gave you your traits?  Who had blonde hair in your family?  Where did the curly hair come from?  All these different questions and some of us never find out the answer.  Some families are not as close as others.  I have family I would not even know if they were standing in front of me.  Some families have reunions every year.  Some never see each other until someone dies.  I have found both of these have positive and negative traits about them.  It is amazing to think that a lot of our happiness and habits is based on someone I have never met because they passed those traits and habits down. 

In the case of some of our inherited traits and attitudes we need to learn better ones if we are going to rise above where we started.  Most people born into a way of life stay in those habits all of their lives.  If you are born into a wealthy family you normally stay wealthy.  If you are born into poverty you normally don’t rise about poverty.  Why is this?  Most of the habits and attitudes we have in life are passed down from one generation to the next.

I don’t say these things to say you can’t rise above.  I am working in my life to rise about right now.  I am making some huge changes to rise above what I was taught.  But to make these changes I have to think and act different then I have before.   If you want to change your life you have to change the way you think first.  Then the universe will catch up.  I am working to change these things now.  It has been a slow process but I am making very good progress.  In the coming weeks I wanna share some of the mindset and action changes I had and are still making.  Please if you see a way you have had to change your habits to rise above please let me know. 

So with those things being said.  Think about your life and your habits.  Are they past down?  Are they serving your purpose in life?  And are you living in the moment in love or are you living in fear? 

Thank you again for reading.  Much love.  Nameste.  

Pearls of Wisdom

Becoming a beautiful Pearl

I learned something about pearls the other day.  I think we would all agree pearls are a very beautiful creation of nature.  One of the most beautiful things that you can give a loved one.  Most pearls are passed down from mothers to daughters.  These are held very precious in families.  Pearls are created because the sand irritates the clam and as a way to cope with that pain the clam creates a layer of enamel to smooth the sand out.  This over time creates what we know as a pearl.   In the bible jesus talked about a man selling all he had for a pearl of great beauty. 

Pearls are created by hardship on the clam.  I think that we become pearls over our lives.  When we have troubles and harsh times come our way we find ways to cope we find ways to rise above these things and become better to become more beautiful.  Over a life time we create coverage of our hurts and pains.  The beauty we experience in life comes from some of our roughest times.  When I look back at my hardships I see that I needed each and every one of them to be who I am today.  The blessings I have in my life are from the lessons I learned from each and every hardship.  So when you are going through the hardships that we must look for the lessons.  We must find that in every difficult thing in life there is a positive takeaway when we find this we can move to our next level of beauty and happiness.  Creating a beautiful life is about understanding that hardships will come but you alone control how you handle them and when you move on. 

I hope that my writings find you well.  I have not been writing lately due to not having internet.  Thank you again for reading.  

I am hurt

How many times have you said those words.  This person hurt my feelings.  I am hurt because they didn't do what i wanted them too.  Why didn't they love me the way i wanted them too.

There is a lot of ways that we lead ourselves to being hurt.  So many ways we can have our feelings damaged by the actions of others.  So many times that we go though strife in our lives and the person that hurt us doesn't even know.  So to have our feelings hurt is a human trait.  For some people this trait happens on a daily basis.  They have issues with others actions on a daily basis.

So are you happy with getting your feelings hurt?  Is that a emotion that you like to experience?  Most people i assume would say no to this question.  So why do we allow others to control our emotions so regularly?  We alone hold the key to that question.  Because there is a truth of the universe you always control your reactions to others actions.  So if that is a universe truth then why do we react negative when we don't like that feeling of the negative emotion?

Well isn't that the 5 million dollar question of happiness.  I  think to answer the question fully we have to look at our conditioning.  We as humans only have actually 10% of our actions on a daily basis that is not conditioned responses.  We are told from a very young age how to react to actions from others.  We are taught that when we don't get what we want to cry and we might get it.  If someone doesn't say what we like to look at the reasons in ourselves they said it.  I honestly think that most of our conditioned responses that we are taught from our parents and others are wrong responses to the stimulus we experience in this world.

 Take fear for example most parents have taught the children when you feel fear to back off.  When you feel that fear response to not go further till you think about it.  I have come to belive that the fear response is releasing the hormones to keep going.  To give us the mental clarity to push though that comfort zone.  But that is for another writing just using that as an example.

So if we are conditioned to give certain responses can we not change those responses to ones that would be better for our well-being and happiness.  So when someone does something to you that would normally hurt your feelings can we not teach ourselves to have a different reaction and better reaction?  We can decide to not hold on to the things people do to us.

This is just a thought i wanted to run past all of my readers.  It is something to think about in everyday life.  I have started using the 180 method to think about others actions differently.  When someone does something that gains a negative response i turn that response and my thoughts 180 degrees from where they were.  I don't always do it but with that a breath exercises i have learned that i can control my reactions.  i will actually be sharing some more about this in my next blog.

I thank you again so much for reading.  Please share this with a friend if you like what i write.  it would help a ton.

I am the victim

Wow What a statement that is.  I AM THE VICTIM.

It is something that a lot of people live on a daily basis.  I did for a long time.  No matter what my situation i always found a reason i was the victim of someone else's actions.  I think that can be one of the biggest defeating attitudes.  Because if you are the victim then even when you do achieve then it is not even your achievement.

I am around a lot of people in my life with the victim mindset.  When something goes wrong the first reaction is to find someone or something to blame for the mistake.  Think about it in your life at work when something goes wrong do the people around you or even yourself look to point the finger.  take the blame and push to to someone else because it will make your life easier.

Take a look at the place you are in life.  Why, in your mind, are you at this point in life?  When you tell your story in your head who is responsible for the place you have in this world?  For a very long time i told myself that it was others FAULT that my life was where it was.  But that also meant when i did something good i would not take full responsibility.

Life is about what YOU do with it not what others do to you.  The control of your life lives within you and you have the ability to create the life that you want.  So truly honestly no one is the victim of anyone else's action for their attitude or place in life.  We have the choice of how to feel about how others treat us and we allow them to stay in our lives or not.  Ultimately when life is over and you are in your last moments what we have done in our life will never be in others hands.  It will be in our hands to look at life and what WE have made of these years on this earth.

Remember You control your thoughts and actions no one else.

Your Birth right

The Definition of the word birthright is a particular right of possession or privilege one has from birth.  This is something that you have the privilege of having just by being born into this world.  It is something that you can take just because you breath on this earth.  

I Truly believe that everyone in this earth has the birthright to be happy.  It is yours to have and it is your right to take.  Happiness can be yours and it is your responsibility to obtain happiness for yourself.  It is no one else's responsibility to make you happy but your own.  No one else's actions, thoughts, or attitudes have any responsibility to make you happy.  Not your husband, your wife, or your family have the responsibility to MAKE you happy.  only you have that responsibility.  I have used the word responsibility a lot in the writing so far because it is so important to obtaining your birthright of living happy and in abundance.  

Only i can effect my happiness.  Yes others can bring good feelings to you and make you feel good.  But ultimately you have to make the choice to be happy in the situations gives you.  Think about this we have all seen someone in a great atmosphere that has chosen to be unhappy even though everything around them says they should be happy.  Well why can't we do it the other way.  Why can't we see the beauty in life in every situation that life gives us.  Even death can be a beautiful thing from a certain perspective.  i have a friend that is a hospice nurse.  Most people tell her that has to be a terrible job watching people die.  no it doesn't have to be a terrible job.  it is a beautiful job that God only gives to the strongest people on the earth to escort people to the next dimension of life is so beautiful.  See all it takes is a 180 turn on things to look at it from a different light.  This technique can bring you close to contentment with life in all situations.  To know that there is beauty in all situations.  Sometimes it is hard to see the beauty and you can't in the storm of the pain in the situation.  Some times it takes time to hurt and to let it bleed.  but the longer you stay in the sadness the harder it is to see the beauty allow yourself that time to bleed but look at from other perspectives as soon as you can.  

We are resposible for your happiness the moment you put in others hands is the moment you lose control of life and feel lost.  when we take the responsibility to heart and know every moment we have the choice of what we feel we are freed from others control and have true freedom in life to be who we are and to be happy.  

You will never find happiness because it lives inside your heart already.  

So take your Birthright and make the choice to be happy by changing your thought processes.  It is not something easy to do but it is your responsibility if you want to be happy and obtain your birthright.  

Rejection

There is a saying the when someone rejects you it says more about them then about you.

I have thought about this saying because i have been rejected here lately and it was one that stung.  By what we are told in this wise saying when this woman stopped talking to me it was because soemthing going on with her and not me.  This is a comforting statement because it takes all the blame off of us.  I do believe people reject us due to their own issues and they are unwilling to accept you for who you are because of their issues with not being open to you.  But i also think rejection has something to do with us.  a lot of time we go after the wrong people or put our needs to the back and the universe feels that and causes the rejection.  We send out thoughts and waves which impact the universe telling it what we wont.  If we think i don't wanna lose this person since we are focused on losing them that is what happens.

I have always felt very deeply very quickly for the people in my life not just in dating but in friendships.  This has always left me open for the hurt of rejection.  I have felt it before and know the sick feeling that someone doesn't want you in their life but you would like to be in theirs.  I have learned in life that everyone is in your life for a season and they teach you something.  That is the wonderful thing about rejection you can learn something everytime.  Because i know that if i am being authentic not everyone will like me.  And i love that fact.

Show your love in actions cause they yell while a text is just a whisper.

Today is great.  you have facebook and twitter.  You have blogs like this one that anyone can get their message out to people.  You have simple text messages that you can use to have whole conversations.  You Can talk and see family all the way around the globe.  It has created connections that before would have never been possible.  It is amazing to learn and see things that the generations before us could never do.  We learn more from the couch then ever before.  They can put a camera in a womb and see a baby grow.  WOW.  What a time we live in truly one of the greatest times in history.


I bet you could see this but coming couldn't you.


What has this done to us.  I truly believe it has made us a weaker people.  addicted to instant gratification and afraid to get out of our homes.  I am addicted to text messages myself.  Think of it you send one and want a response when you don't get one from that person you feel hurt and offended.  Then you get mad at them for not paying enough attention to you.  Then you send another then another.  it is an addiction.  Then you have facebook and other social media where you can log on and see what your"friends" had for lunch and what their babies look like without ever breaking beard with them or even seeing those small babies.  You can learn so much about people just by looking at their profile.  But we don't pick up the phone and call a friend and say i love you we text it.  We have lost the ability in a lot of ways to go and find those friends in real life.  Technology has changed everything about society.  Form the beauty in a handwritten note to the awesome feeling of talking to the girl or guy you are crushing on for hours.  The things we are loosing are beautiful and they shouldn't be lost.  Don't get me wrong technology has helped us reach more people and helped in so many ways.  But don't ever forget how to love someone face to face and express those feelings other then a text message or on facebook.

My you have a blessed day.  Call someone that you love and tell them today.  Or better yet go see them.  take them to dinner.  Show your love in actions cause they yell while a text is just a whisper.

Gratitude

I haven't posted in the eddvate brand in a long time.  To be honest this is because i have been doing some major soul searching.  I am not going to discuss that here for all to hear but i believe sometimes it is good to move yourself away from things to see where you truly are.  There are times where i have issues with gratitude and i focus on what i don't have.  I know this can be an issue for a lot of the western world.  I found this awesome list today that put things is perspective for me.  I hope it does the same for you.

Even in uncertain times, it’s always important to keep things in perspective.

1. You are alive.

2. You are able to see the sunrise and the sunset.

3. You are able to hear birds sing and waves crash.

4. You can walk outside and feel the breeze through your hair and the sun’s warmth on your skin.

5. You have tasted the sweetness of chocolate cake.

6. You didn’t go to sleep hungry last night.

7. You awoke this morning with a roof over your head.

8. You had a choice of what clothes to wear.

9. You haven’t feared for your life today.

10. You have overcome some considerable obstacles, and you have learnedand survived.

11. You often worry about what you’re going to do with your life – your career, your family, the next step, etc. – which means you have ambition, passion, drive, and the freedom to make your own decisions.

12. You live in a country that protects your basic human rights and civil liberties.

13. You are reasonably strong and healthy – if you got sick today, you could recover.

14. You have a friend or relative who misses you and looks forward to your next visit.

15. You have someone with whom to reminisce about ‘the good old days.’

16. You have access to clean drinking water.

17. You have access to medical care.

18. You have access to the Internet.

19. You can read.

These are beautiful things that i and a lot of us take for granted.  We may not have what we want but if we focus on lack you will always have lack.  I will be writing another blog later today and posting tonight or tomorrow.  Have a blessed day.  And HUg someone.  

eddavate: Thoughts are things

eddavate: Thoughts are things:                                                                     Wow What a last few days Eddie has had.  It is amazing ho...

Thoughts are things

                                                                    Wow

What a last few days Eddie has had.  It is amazing how one mindset change that has been holding you back can change your outlook.  Reading think and grow rich has really showed me the power our thoughts have.  We limit ourselves in so many different ways in our lives.  The human spirit has so much strength in it and we just accept what we think we see.  We let others control the happiness of our days when it is the very lens we see life though that causes our days to be the way they are. 

We let our current situation define what our futures will be.  We let our current bank accounts define our future earnings. How much could we achieve if we truly knew that everything we think becomes something if we nurture it and let our subconscious mind marinate it and bring it into reality.  If we will just give up the fear that life and people have taught us over the years and just believe that the universe has our back.  If we could just learn that God gave us fear to push us though new situations.  We could achieve so much in life and have such a better experience on this little rock in space if we just gave up the fear and went through it. 

    Until the past few months I lived a life that I only saw the negative.  I was never going to have enough.  I was never going to be enough.  Money would run out.  And I brought a lot of this to reality.  When I would date someone I wasn’t enough for them so it would end.  I would think they are not interested in me and really they were I just read the wrong story by their actions.  It is amazing how much time and energy I have given the negative in my life.  I have always believed I wasn’t good enough to do anything in life because I hadn’t done much already in life.  That others were better because they were still married or they had a nicer car or whatever.  I would always find a reason I was not good enough.  But in the past few months I have learned that the very thoughts that I was not good enough was making me not good enough.  I truly believe I had to achieve to have the confidence to be able to achieve in my life.  That is Bull shit.  We must first love ourselves and believe we are worthy of love, abundance and all the juice that life has to offer.  I will a kick ass life to quote someone that has helped my journey a lot.  But only I can make it kick ass.  Only you can choose to have a kick ass life and to be happy every day.  I truly have found my calling in everyday life of being a day maker and helping other find happiness and though that I truly find an inner peace and happiness. 

Think and Grow Rich.

Over the past year i have been deep in personal development and growing in my everyday life.  I have shared a lot of this though this and my other blogs.  From joining isagenix to learning to focus more on the moment i have taken steps for a long time to better myself.  I have always felt held back by my lack of follow though on most subjects.  I tend to really be mean to myself when is comes to stumbling on the everyday tasks that i want to make habits when i don't follow though.  this puts me behind and i give up.  This has always been an issue for me due to my lack of accountability type people in my life.  And i know that if i can get over this hurdle my life would change tremendously and i have learned that i can only depend on myself for this help.  I know that I am not the only one that struggles with this and that's why i wanted to share this with all of your reading.

With that being said i have started reading think and grow rich tonight.  One of the greatest self development books ever written.  This book deal a lot with thoughts and learning to use your thoughts to grow rich.   Whether that be in money or in love or whatever these principles have been in use forever.  I am going to be tracking what i learn and sharing some with you.  I will not commit to writing ever night or even and set amount of days but you will be seeing Blogs about the things i am learning and my results.  I hope that you truly enjoy and can grow with me.

Gifts

When i originally started to think about writing on gifts i had a reason behind it.  Some things that had happened in the past few weeks had really inspired me to write about gifts and the effects that they have on people.  But the things that people said really changed my view on what i was going to write.  It is amazing how when you have the intention how the universe leads you to find exactly what you intend.  

Gifts can be described as many different things.  They are things we give to one another.  They can be talents that we have.  They can be how we feel about the people in our lives.  So there are many ways we think of gifts and what that word means to you.  Over all gifts are a positive thing in our lives that helps us feel the acceptance and love that is our main desire in life as humans.  If a person is a gift to you then they help fulfill that need.  If it is a thing then the giving of that thing helps you feel that way.  In our society giving gifts is so important.  We are taught from a very early age that love is reflected in the gifts that we receive from loved ones on holidays and birthdays.  If these gifts are not given then there is a sadness at time because of what is not given.  This is our society it has taught at least my generation that love is expressed in things. Meanwhile a lot of relgions and cultures teach that the true gifts in life and the people that we touch and that touch our lives.  

When i posted the question what is the best gift you have been given the response i received is not the one i expected.  i got responses like my mother, my children and my friends.  This is awesome to say but it is not what i intended to hear.  These answers are so true in most peoples lives.  The true gifts of the spirit are the ones we are given by the people that we love and they are not always tangible.  In this world it seems that everyone is obsessed with tangible results.  That if you can not count it then it is not true and is not something worth having.  We find this in business a lot that if you don't have a number to up held to then you are not doing your job.  I truly do not believe this to be fact.  I truly believe it is the in tangible things that make humans the happiest.  The things of the spirit are the things that make people happy with their experiences in life.  The intangible things are the true gifts.  The people we meet that don't ask us for anything but go the extra mile for us.  The people that take time to live in the moment and treat us like that humans that we are.  the people that make us feel special are the ones that you want to do business with and have in our lives.  

I truly believe that we get what we give in this world.  So if you give the gift of living in the moment and taking time for everyone that crosses your path.  treating everyone like the amazing person that they are and deserve to be treated as. Then I truly believe you will get that back to you.  And getting this is the best gift that you will ever receive and you are in control of whether or not you receive it.  If you wanna feel special then make others feel special.  If you wanna feel loved then make others feel loved.  The greatest gift you can be given you control whether or not you get it.  

What a wonderful World

This Blog is inspired by my son. His song that we played him while is was in the womb was what a wonderful world by louis armstrong.  It was interesting i was listening to the podcast i listen to every week and David Wood played that song on my sons birthday.  That is amazing to me.

That got me started thinking about how amazing this world we get to live in is.  Every breath that we get to take on this planet is a blessing.  I could die in the next second and I am not taking advantage of the time I have on this planet.  WOW.  Most of us have heard this our whole life yet we still do not squeeze the juice out of this life.  We just go from one day to the next and losing all since of each day and the just melt into each other.  Meanwhile somewhere there is a young child dying and they didn't even get half the days that we have wasted.  Kids are so in tune with this they really don't care what happens tomorrow they live in the moment.  Adults we just live either in the past or the future and loss the moment.  We never achieve our full potential at the fear of failing or having to go without.  Fear keeps us in a sad life not willing to truly live this life.  I do this so much saying no when i should just say yes and let the universe figure the rest out.  I am getting better but we all know of times where we have said no when we should have said yes.  then we beat ourselves up about it.  WOW.

This being said i am setting a goal for myself.  To fight for the moment.  To do mindful things to focus on the moment.  Look at this amazing world we live in.  Don't miss it cause once it is gone it is gone.

Whats on your bucket list?

Focus

I have written on this subject before but today i had such a realization of how important focus really is in life that I had to share.

In the law of manifestation it states what we focus on grows and continues in your life.  So what ever that we give our attention to will become more prevalent in our lives.  What we spend our money on will take a bigger place in our life.  WOW.  So if we wanna see where we will be in 6 months look at what you spend your time doing today.  look at what you spent money on today that is what you will be spending money on in 6 months.

In the movie The Secret they speak about the law of attraction and that you can manifest things in your life if you focus on them and feel them then they will come in your life.

This works for negative things in your life too.  If you spend your time lying about your life to make it sound better it will always be that way.  you will always have to lie to make your life better instead of making it truly better.  IF you spend your time looking at negative things and around negative people then your life will never get better cause the influence on you is negative.  If you never try something new then you will never ever have something better then what you have right now.  This is such a huge truth in the area of self development.

So If you are a reader do something this week that will get you out of your comfort zone.  If it is as simple as trying a new food or going for a walk in a new park.

Thank you again for taking the time to read this.

We take time to cry.

This is actually inspired by my daughter this morning.

So many times we take time to cry about what has happened to us.  And we take so much time that other things pass us by.  I noticed today that a simple task can turn into a huge emotional issue if we let it.  I see this in my life a lot.  The boss asks you to do something.  You take time to bitch about how she asked it and what she said instead of just doing it.  The boss asks you to do something you do it but go to the smoke circle and bitch about it for 15 minutes and poison others day.  Some one insults you to make themselves feel better and you take it on yourself and hurt for hours even days.  All of these things can bring us down and take our emotional health down.  We start to question ourselves which kills our confidence and our gratitude.   With out both of these things we find ourselves choking and Dying inside because the garden of life can only be grown in good positive soil.

I have started to learn what one of my teachers has been talking about for years.  Instant forgiveness.  This is such a strong thing.  To say they are human also and move on let it go and move to the next task or thought is so powerful.  It is a slow process for me to have learned but i am slowly reducing the time i stay in hate and forgiveness.  I think this is important to know that it will not happen over night.  It will take time to heal from the past and you should feel pain and understand that it is part of being human.  But to let that rule you for longer then you need to heal to let that effect the way you treat others.  That is not the way to live a truly happy life.  I am starting to learn in life that we must live every moment to the fullest. and forgive ourselves when we don't.  As my father always says there is only one perfect man they hung him on a cross.

Bob Ross Remixed | Happy Little Clouds | PBS Digital Studios

Truth

Over the past few days i have found the power of truth in lives.  and this i believe is the next step to happiness actually should probably be the first step.  One of my mentors david wood says to tell the truth all the time with compassion.  I truly believe this is the only way to true happiness.  Because if honesty doesn't run in your veins then the life you lead is just a lie.  The things and "happiness" you attain is just a lie.  You can attain things and have a lot of possessions and that can look like happiness.  But when you lay your head on your pillow at night you can't rest because you are trying to keep up with the next lie.

I have lived my life telling lie after lie.  I have said on my blogs before i am addicted to lying and always will be just as a alcoholic will always be that way.  I am doing a lot better with the truth and knowing that my true story is worth of being told.  It may not be the glamour life of some others but it is mine and it has brought me here.  My past has brought me here but does not in anyway define what my future will be.  i am proud to be able to write this and help some people.  

Truth in life and words always finds a way to happiness.  it may drive some people out of your life.  but those that leave never wanted the true you anyways.  It may angry some.  But you don't tell the truth for how is effects others.  you tell the truth because that is the only way to truly be free.  you can say the truth with compassion for others and good will in your heart.  But the truth will always be there and should always be told.

Am i perfect at this NO.  I have told big lies little lies all kinds as most of us have.  This society has made it such that it is encouraged.  Just tell a lie to make others feel better. but to be honest that doesn't help anyone.

I truly hope this writing has helped you in some way.  God bless you

Can you find your Happy place?

In the last post i wrote about true happiness and what I think is the broken western system of happiness.  To have things is not the true path to happiness.  Well today i wanna talk about one thing that i think can bring happiness and why i believe that it is a cornerstone of a true happy life.  

I truly believe that gratitude is a cornerstone of a truly happy life.  Gratitude is the key to seeing things in a different lens then what the world teaches.  When you truly look around you will not see what you don't have but what you do.  In america we have so many blessings that we over look and wish for the next best thing.  That type of happiness that will never be obtained because you will always be seeking the next thing.  I am a firm believer that when we start looking at what we do have and being thankful for those things that the things we can be thankful for multiple.  This is the simple law of attraction.  When we focus on what we do want then the universe gives us more of that.  This is one of the basic laws of the universe.  when you are around positive people your life becomes more positive by default because you stop looking at what is wrong and look at what is right.  i think this is one of the most beautiful things in the universe.  We can simple be ourselves and look at the positive things in our lives and we will see more of them.  

This Function ,however, can not be achieved over night because we were not taught to think about the wrong things over night.  It is a lifetime of the society teaching us these things. One of the simple things i have learned to do is to keep a gratitude journal. This is easy very easy to keep.  Every night before you lay your head down on your pillow just write down 3 things you are thankful for from that day.  Then take one positive interaction and write about it in length.  Go though the action bit by bit and break it do.  this will release your intention to live a happier life you into the ether of the universe.  Then take it s step further tell the people in your life you are thankful for them.  Having gratitude for someone and not telling them is like have a car with no gas.  You have to tell people how you feel for them to know it.  

Also a great app for the iphone that i have been using it the happier app.  It lets you share your happy moments with others.  

Thank you again for taking your time to read my blog and what i believe can truly help you in life.  May you steps in life be guided by your hearts desires.  

Have you found True Happiness?

This starts my week of posting at least twice a week.  I am going to make a theme for the next few weeks of happiness.  The dalai lama says the purpose of our lives is to be happy.  The reason we do what we do is a hope for happiness either now or in the future.  I am starting to truly understand what the pursuit of happiness is and what happiness truly is.  In this writing i am going to talk about why i believe we were taught the wrong thing in the society about happiness.

When most of us were growing up we were told that to be happy we had to have things.  Look at the tradition of Christmas for a lot of us the ones we remember are the ones we got what we wanted in life.  This is how most western culture children are taught.  the harder you work and the more you have the happier you are.  You will be happy once you reach your goals.  This to me is a lie.  The thought that only things outside yourself can make you happy is one of the biggest lies of the western culture.  It keeps the economy going and keeps you in a prison of going to the next thing never truly finding that happiness cause once you reach one you are not longer happy cause you are reaching for the next.  This leads to people never feeling that they are good enough which leads to low self esteem which has most of you know is what i think is the biggest problem with the world today.

I have been in this mindset most my life.  I have been told by this society i have not achieved enough to be happy.  I am a 32 year old man that lives with his mother and lives on a tight budget.  So by the world standards i am not a success and should not be happy.  I got a new car and didn't truly feel happy cause i needed a new home.  It is funny when i look at it has a witness the more debt and the more things i have should make me happy but just brings me more stress over the money.  I am starting to learn what happiness is truly is and how to get there.  the next few posts will be about happiness and how i feel we can reach that happiness in a true sense.

Intention and the new year.

My intention with making a new blog called eddavate was to regularly write about finding purpose as i go though my journey in this life.  I wanted to share my education and motivate others at the same time.  i have not been consistent in the writing of the blog and the material that i share with those that read it.  With this new year i am going to be changing that.  I will have a schedule of when i write and are going to focus in on things that i can share and spread.  Starting this year i will be writing twice a week and going to be researching different people and different things that i believe can help others.  the twice a week will not be a set days of the week but twice a week.  I thank you for taking time to read this and the future posts.  Please share with friends as i write and you enjoy.  The first thing i will be writing about is the holidays and gratitude.  I will release this writing on 01/02/13.  Again Share with friends and i hope that you will enjoy that writings.